Stop Making Mountains out of Molehills
Song of Songs 2:15 Catch us the foxes, the little foxes, that ruin the vineyards — for our vineyards are in blossom.
Anyone who’s been married for any length of time will tell you, that the little foibles in their marriage partner that they once found endearing – at some point, became incredibly annoying.
When I first married my beautiful wife, I discovered that she had a dark secret. Did you know, that she squeezes the toothpaste from the top of the tube instead of the bottom – can you believe it?! At first I laughed, but pretty soon, it was driving me crazy.
It’s like that old Chinese water torture. Drip, drip, drip on your forehead … and after it’s gone on for a while, each drip feels like a brick falling on your head.
Dr David Clarke, a marriage counsellor with a couple of decades of experience, has written a fantastic book called, “Kiss Me Like You Mean It”. And in it, based on years of clinical experience with thousands of couples, he makes this startling, this shocking, point:
That within just a few years, the initial passion in a marriage dies, in 100% of cases. 100%!!
Now, one of the things he talks, one of the things that drains the passion out of a marriage, is those little things that annoy you. If you’re married, there are things that your wife or husband do, that drive you nuts. Correct?!
But the problem isn’t so much the thing itself – that odd quirk or annoying behaviour. No, the problem is that we make mountains out of molehills, through our choice to judge rather than to forgive; our decision to assert our individual rights, rather than to submit to one another.
No, the problem isn’t the quirk or the habit, it’s our spirit of criticism – and that always drains the passion out of a marriage.
There’s a fabulous book in the Old Testament all about the passion in a marriage – an amazing book, for the fact that God decided to include it as part of His living Word. That’s how seriously He takes the passion in your marriage:
Catch us the foxes, the little foxes, that ruin the vineyards — for our vineyards are in blossom. (Song of Songs 2:15)
Yeah, it’s always those little foxes that spoil the vine. So if you want to see the vineyard of your marriage in full bloom and bearing fruit, let me tell you – you need to catch those little foxes and kick them out. It’s as simple as that!
And that means grabbing hold of your bad habit of making mountains out of molehills and dealing with your own crummy attitude over those little things.
Because it’s those little foxes that are ruining your vineyard.
That’s God’s Word. Fresh … for you … today.
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